Across The Capital
Catriona Howson
Once again the UK’s sex life is being brought into question. Some suggesting we are too prude, shying away from confronting sex questions, giggling like a school girl in the corner.
Well, let’s talk about school girls, after all they are the demographic we are failing to educate – with one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in Europe. I do not want to debate if this is a positive life affirming experience, I think it is a failure of the system. Sexual health charity Brook’s publication today confirmed that teens feel let down by their schools sex education, and understandably. Placing a condom on a banana does not easily illustrate what to do when the condom breaks.
In fact throughout my own entire high school experience, what to do when the condom breaks was not discussed. The mantra was safe sex, safe sex, safe sex. Perhaps it is better to trick our teens to believe in the condom, to wrap it up rather than to think don’t bother!
I concur, teens will have sex. I did. My parents did. By rule of nature, the likelihood is that our teenage population are getting frisky. Hand holding and kissing quickly gets replaced, though not by everyone! There is an interesting resurgence in moralistic behaviour and the shunning of unwed bed sharing.
The majority of teens do not fit the latter and given half a choice would be at it like rabbits. This is the blunt truth. It is a hard truth to swallow as a parent, and one the state is struggling with. Is this why we have the backward idea of banning pornography from our teens?
There is a fine line between child – who we should protect and nurture, and teen – who we should education and allow to prosper. Major philosophical, psychological and educational debates have spiralled from this line and the main militant campaign is that we have over sexualised our children.
But of course we have, we are screwed up completely over sex. We see a gyrating pop starlet grinding and miming and we don’t think it’s debated – we think it’s advertising. Sex sells her music. We see two of Hollywood’s greats getting jiggy. Its part of the story. Yet we have an issue with the blunt overt side of sex.
Pornography is seen as a dirty taboo. Used by those who cant get satisfaction elsewhere, this coming from a country that has an Ann Summers on every high street, underwear models on billboards and shows like Babestation freely available on freeview. Pornography gives our teens body issues? No actually companies and size zero models give our teens serious issues; with photoshopping and airbrushing. Give teens tools to identify these, and they will prosper confidently.
Show them porn and quickly they will learn bodies come in all shapes and all sizes, many so surgically altered their breasts look like concrete. Let them come to the conclusion that porn just like everything else is a lot less exciting if we take away our taboos.
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I agree that a more in depth approach to the education side is needed for teenagers, as well as finding a way to show them that the so called “perfect bodies” that the celebrities seem to have in magazine photo spreads aren’t real.
The real question is how this could be achieved in a way that wouldn’t offend “prudish” parents, who often have the view that abstinence is the only way.